20230310 Raven Newsletter

Hail GFOP!

I type with fingers quivering at the prospect of what surreal unpredictability the Premier League will unleash upon us this weekend. Is it really less than seven days since Liverpool defenestrated Manchester United, and Arsenal dragged themselves off the canvas, spat a few of their own bloodied teeth out of their mouth, and proceeded to obliterate the Cherries? If Chaos is a Ladder, the Premier League is pure rungs, steps, and side rails. The only morsel of consistency giving the world the delusion of a sense of order is Everton reliably conjuring a way to disappoint and traumatize. And Bruno Fernandes feeling gravity more than normal human beings. Bring it on. 

This has been a remarkable week at Men In Blazers. One in which we have spent time with Pep Guardiola (we talked about Tim Ream a lot), Marcus Rashford (who told me Tim Howard was his childhood hero), the mighty Sam Mewis, and inspirational Chris Richards. We spent a magical night in Boston, that rollicking town of Affleck, Ralph Waldo Emerson, and many Mewises. Amidst all of that, the true wonder was the launch of VAMOS Presented by Bud Light, a new podcast we have created with Herc Gomez. More on that below. It is something I am so proud of personally and professionally, as I adore Herc and am so delighted to bring his voice and audience to the MiB Network. My goal for 2023-24 is to do good things with great people, and we have more announcements to come in the month ahead.  

PS. Incredible J.J. Watt podcast drops tomorrow. Chelsea fans in particular – must-listen. 

2. To the Football

i. Bournemouth vs. Liverpool (Saturday, 7.30 AM ET, USA)

It is easy to accuse the Premier League writers of “Lazy Writing” as we watch them trundle out Liverpool’s hug-and-fist-pump-fueled charge back from the brink straight into the Top Four. However, even I have to admit, the small plane/Large Protest Banner before the Reds 7-0 smiting of Manchester United was a haunting human detail Ingmar Bergman would have appreciated. Liverpool won the reverse fixture 9-0 back in August. Bournemouth have won one game in their last 12. As the banner at Anfield said: "Enough is Enough".

ii. Leicester vs. Chelsea (Saturday, 10 AM ET, USA)

Champions League victory over Dortmund has brought Graham Potter a reprieve. Flailing Leicester are exactly the kind of patsy he needs to pad his record and create at least a patina of confidence. Lose, and the fume from Chelsea’s traveling faithful will counter the good vibes beer-clutching Todd Boehly is attempting to spread after nervy back-to-back wins.

More: Lovely profile of Ben Chilwell, surging again post-injuries.

iii. Everton vs. Brentord (Saturday, 10 AM ET, P’Cock)

A traumatic team forged of perpetual chaos meet a small, unfashionable club who are built around sensible alignment and intelligent strategy. What could possibly go wrong? Brentford are now proud holders of the longest unbeaten streak in the top flight. They have not lost in 12 games, reaching back to Oct. 23. I admire Thomas Frank’s achievement so very much, avoiding that “difficult second season album” that has done in the hopes of Sheffield United and Leeds in years past. It has come to this for Everton: As I sit here and think through the myriad of possibilities for the game, Everton scoring goals and winning it are not amongst them. 

Funny: Sean Dyche when asked about how Dominic Calvert-Lewin is and his mindset: “He seems alright to me. He’s given me a few fashion ideas and he’s pointed me in the right direction”.

iii. Tottenham vs. Nottingham Forest (Saturday, 10 AM ET, P’Cock)

Antonio Conte’s Last Stand? After a brutal surgery, the Italian is looking out of time and out of care. Something had to give when a gent who always wins met Tottenham’s perpetually self-sabotaging culture. Wednesday night’s Champions League exit was some nadir. Sending on Davinson Sanchez when your team was desperate for a goal smelled a lot like surrender, leaving Spurs fans raging. How can a squad that features Harry Kane, Sonny, Kulu, and Richarlison fail to score a single time against AC Milan - in two legs - or Sheffield United? Pochettino and Tuchel are amongst those waiting in the wings. Lose against Forest and change could be afoot. The end of a strange, hard-to-watch loveless marriage. 

iv. Crystal Palace vs. Manchester City (Saturday, 12.30 PM ET, NBC Proper)

​​Palace remain the only team to have avoided winning in 2023. Their last victory came on New Year’s Eve. The goals have dried up. Erling Haaland alone has scored six more times than their entire squad. Pray for Palace.

v. Fulham vs. Arsenal (Sunday, 10 AM ET, P’Cock) 

⏰ Note the off-kilter kick-off time as the hour goes forward ⏰

“We’re Reiss Nelson’s Arsenal now.” Will Europa League fatigue kick in? Will Manor Solomon continue his tear? Pep’s agent Tim Ream will relish the opportunity to repel whichever young academy-reared Gunner is flung out with hopes of becoming Arsenal’s latest late, late hero.

More: Arsenal have generated 15 points from losing positions in the Premier League this season, which is more than anyone else in the competition. Miguel Delaney on their fighting spirit. 

vi. Manchester United vs. Southampton (Sunday, 10 AM ET, P’Cock)

The sheen of that lusty Carabao Cup was immediately tarnished and discolored by the seven goals Liveprool lashed past Manchester United last weekend while Captain/Heel Bruno clowned himself. Yesterday’s Europa victory in which Antony thrashed this banger (and even Wout Weghorst scored) was some panacea, but three points and locking down a Champions League return is the season’s imperative. 

More: Full Premier League broadcast schedule HERE

3. VAMOS with Herc Gomez

I love Herc Gomez. I adored him as a player – he was always a gent you could talk to post-game, and he would offer you insight that would make you think differently about what you had just seen. I love him even more as a broadcaster. When something happens in our region, his is always the opinion I find myself seeking out to understand what is going on. As we decided to build out MiB’s talent roster, Herculez was one of the first people I reached out to. I wanted a voice that could guide us through the dominant storylines crackling around our region. With a Copa America and World Cup hurtling towards these shores, Liga MX firmly established as the most-watched league in the United States, and MLS embarking on its Apple-era, the sound of the tectonic plates shifting beneath the corner of our football world now booms unmistakably. VAMOS is our attempt to craft an accessible, intelligent, weekly source every Thursday for everything you need to know about the biggest football stories on our continent, delivered by a gent who understands the drivers that will shape the American game of the future. Welcome also to producer Juan Castro, who is helming this project. We are lucky to have you.

And a quick mention for the composer who did the custom music for VAMOS. The same gent who played the Star Spangled Banner for our Go! Go! USA! Podcast. From Washington, DC, the one and only Robert McDonald. Check him out HERE or on social @_robbiemcdonald. 

I also want to thank so many of you for your feedback on this pilot episode. This is a show we are going to build and build with so much more to come. You GFOPs taking time to give us feedback and suggestions means the world to us. We are setting up a dedicated email and phone line to come. To more. To more. 

LISTEN TO THE FIRST EPISODE HERE: Herc went deep on the possibility of former USMNT defender Oguchi Onyewu becoming US Soccer's next Sporting Director; Chivas' hot start to 2023 in Liga MX; and Messi to MLS rumors. 

4. More Football, Did Ya Say?

ii. Ronaldo storms off, kicks water bottles after failing to score, losing, and hearing fans chant “Messi, Messi.” Saudi League turning into Must-Watch for all the wrong reasons. 

b. Elite Clubs’ Revenue and percentage of sponsorship. Manchester City 👀

5. “More Men In Blazers” Said No One Ever 🍻

i. Herc's Podcast led a lineup packed with Pods this week, including The Men in Blazers Podcast where Rog and Davo reacted to Liverpool's 7 - 0 beatdown of United; Rog and Rory Smith going deep on Eric Maxim Choupo-Moting and Gelato on European Nights, Presented by Paramount+; and Rog providing instant reaction to this week's Champions League Round of 16 games on Do it Live!. 

ii. Talking of the Men in Blazers Podcast... have we mentioned you can now watch Rog and Davo on video for the entire Pod ONLY ON OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL, which contains so much content these days. And this week, after your overwhelming response to our Peter Drury Podcast, we created a video version of our interview with the Premier League Poet Laureate, so you could watch as well. This contains Peter reliving some of his all-time calls. It is not to be missed. Protect this man at all costs. 

iii. If you like this newsletter, can we also recommend a side dish of American States United, our Wednesday newsletter offering that recaps all of America's biggest and brightest stars playing abroad? SUBSCRIBE HERE🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

iv. FOLLOW MEN IN BLAZERS ON TIKTOK. Follow us. We promise. No Rog Dances. Ever.

6. Tensions in women’s game an unstoppable force in charge towards World Cup

The Women’s World Cup is just 132 days away. So many elite teams, including Canada, Spain, and France are experiencing their players having to battle their own federations in the battle for equality, or even just a safe work culture in which to play. The Canadian women are seething at the lack of transparency of their federation. French manager Corinne Diacre has just been sacked after leading players threatened to boycott the World Cup. 

A delight then to have some great news to celebrate. On Wednesday, International Women’s Day, the U.K. government announced it will provide roughly $710.4 million over the next two years to create equal school opportunities for girls — including requirements to offer equal sporting access and a minimum two hours of physical education per week. You might remember the shocking narrative during England’s Euro 22 win when it was revealed that only 46% of English schools currently provide the same extracurricular opportunities for girls as boys, according to the FA, while only 67% of all schools and 41% of secondary schools offer equal soccer opportunities in Phys Ed lessons. To more positive stories and true action steps in the months to come. 

7. Not Football and all the better for It

i. Fake Bands, Real Songs: The 50 Best Tunes by Made-Up Musicians. The difference between a real musician and a made-up musician feels purely semantic, but accepting the conceit, this is the only valid answer.

ii. It’s Chris Pine Time! Chris Pine has made a bunch of good movies in his career but every so often I do worry for him that he will never match the quality of performance he gave in Princess Diaries 2. This profile did not reassure me.

iii. And the Oscar Goes to…The Guy Who Inspired Big League Chew? "Field played ball when asked what Lydia Tár would think of his most iconic creation. 'She was a serious youth hockey player who definitely used her allowance for Big League Chew,' he said. 'For the record, she only chewed Outta Here Original.'"

iv. What’s a scanner? Gen Z Discovering Workplace Tech. Calling a scanner "workplace tech" is a little like categorizing a refrigerator as heavy machinery that one should not operate while on Klonopin. That being said, does anyone know how to use the scanner in the copy room??

v. Binmen ordered to not drink or have fun at weekends. As if their job wasn’t garbage enough.

vi. The Most Enigmatic Works in Art History. Ron Ron Statue???

vii. What running does to the knees, according to a large survey of marathon runners. Everton's midfield not going to have to bother to read this one.

viii. The Italian pirate mixtape empire that brought pop to the people. Article or movie starring Michael Cera with a pencil-thin blonde mustache? 

ix. Agnes Callard’s Marriage of the Minds. Agnes Callard is one of American academia's greatest creations. There's a line in here where her second husband "finally understands the purpose of furniture" that will simultaneously make and ruin your weekend. 

xi. What Do Women Want on Their Wrists? Two nights ago I had a dream that I was at an antique store trying on a Cartier Tank Française. The owner of the shop was my high school bible teacher and also the world was about to end. Still trying to work out what this all meant. 

xii.  Peak TV Is Over. Welcome to Trough TV. Don't cry because Peak TV is over. Laugh because we now have much more screen time on our hands with which to watch MILF Manor.

That is it for today. I want to leave you with a really important story from this week: The Black Football Partnership issued their annual report on the lack of black coaches hired throughout English football. The study revealed the hiring rate in England is the worst in Europe and there has been no significant change in Black management-related recruitment between 2021 and 2023, with “broken rungs” at the bottom of the ladder inhibiting career progress. BFP are now calling on the game to “get around the table” to develop a meaningful partnership to achieve change. Miguel Delaney wrote a really thoughtful piece about it in the Independent. No one wants to talk about this, but no amount of kneeling before games will change anything unless there is serious talk and even more strategic action. To better days ahead for all. 

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