Bodø/Glimt’s fairytale is so headily romantic and theoretically impossible, that even Disney’s most grandiose filmmakers wouldn’t dare conceptualize it. In their first-ever Champions League campaign, the Norwegians just knocked out three-time winners and Serie A leaders Inter Milan, and they made it look kind of easy. Yesterday’s 2-1 win at the San Siro means Bodø are the first Norwegian side to ever reach the UCL last 16 and they’ve done it with a plastic pitch, no star players and few resources or outside investment. Don’t let anyone tell you football has lost its magic. 🏆

Today, we turn a trepidatious eye to the Bernabéu, as José Mourinho returns to Madrid for the second leg of Benfica’s knockout tie with the 15-time champions. Last week in Lisbon, Real Madrid’s Vinícius Júnior accused Benfica’s Gianluca Prestianni of making racist comments towards him, a fire only stoked further by the visceral reactions of some fans in the Estádio da Luz, as well as Mourinho’s toxic post-match comments. Despite suspensions, both he and Prestianni have traveled to the Spanish capital, where 80,000 Madridistas will unite to help carry Los Blancos into the next round. 🇪🇸

Also: For anyone wondering what happens after today – When is the Champions League last-16 draw and how does it work? 🤔

ii. If you’re looking for a refresher on all the layers of complexity attached to today’s headline matchup, let Rog and Rory Smith walk you through why racist acts keep happening in football, if UEFA is doing enough to prevent it, and how the sport can better protect its players. Watch their full conversation here. 📺

iii. Speaking of Rog, make sure to join him and James Horncastle TODAY for “Big Match Breakdown LIVE” on YouTube at 5 p.m. ET immediately after the whistle blows on this afternoon’s round of UCL games. Come be with us. 🍻

iv. Also, our Soccer's Coming Home Countdown Tour is hitting the road again next month. We have limited tickets left for our HOUSTON show with Rog, J.J. Watt and Hakeem Olajuwon at Rice University’s Brockman Hall for Opera on March 4. And we just announced a new show in ATLANTA at The Eastern on March 27. Get your tickets here for that one, it’s going to be a banger. 🎉

v. ICYMI from over the weekend, stop what you’re doing and watch what happens when a seagull, a football, and the laws of probability collide. Truly one of the strangest things we’ve ever seen on a pitch (and yes, the seagull was OK). 🪽

Also, behold: A croissant really hates to see Erling Haaland coming. 🥐

Cheers,
Tommy Stewart & Max Bonem

PS - We’re calling it right now: this might be the greatest week in Norwegian sports history. 🇳🇴

As we think about the future of football fandom - the stories, the culture, the experiences around the game - we want your input. We have a short survey that’s designed to help us understand what matters most to you, what sounds exciting, and what you feel is missing. It should only take a few minutes, but will have a huge impact in shaping what we do next. As a thank you, everyone who lends us their voice will have the chance to win one of two $100 MiB Shop gift cards.

Inter Milan 🇮🇹 1-2 Bodø/Glimt 🇳🇴 (Agg. 2-5)

The resilience Bodø/Glimt showed early on in this game made Helm’s Deep look like child’s play, and with goalkeeper Nikita Haikin playing the part of Gimli with gloves, Inter Milan’s 33 shots ultimately amounted to nothing. Cristian Chivu’s men knocked and knocked to no avail, but when the Norwegians forced an error from Manuel Akanji in the second half, Jens Petter Hauge made it count as he so often has in this tournament. On his return to the San Siro after an unsuccessful spell with AC Milan four years ago, he bagged his sixth goal in nine UCL matches this season. Hauge then turned provider for Håkon Evjen after a typically smooth Bodø move stunned one of Europe’s loudest arenas into silence. Alessandro Bastoni’s reply came too late, and while Bodø’s conquering of Manchester City, Atlético Madrid and Inter is a miracle, a quick glance at the remaining teams in the tournament paints a travesty for Italian football.

More: This stat shows just how improbable Bodø/Glimt’s run really is.

Atlético Madrid 🇪🇸 4-1 Club Brugge 🇧🇪 (Agg. 7-4)

After a box office draw in Bruges last week, Diego Simeone wasn’t going to let the opportunity of a knockout bout with either Liverpool or Tottenham escape his side. Largely thanks to Jan Oblak’s goalkeeping acrobatics, Atleti went in 1-1 at halftime, so when USMNT midfield enforcer Johnny Cardoso banged home his first goal for the club (and in the UCL) minutes after the break, the tension broke in the Metropolitano. Norwegian football had another reason to celebrate after 6'5" striker Alexander Sørloth completed his hat-trick in the second half, having scored the opener. The 30-year-old battering ram now has 15 goals this season and plays the role of a terrifying and ominous shadow behind Erling Haaland in the national team.

Newcastle 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 3-2 Qarabağ 🇦🇿 (Agg. 9-3)

When Sandro Tonali and Joelinton made it 2-0 within six minutes at St. James’ Park yesterday, Qarabağ may as well have packed up and made the 2,529-mile trip back to Azerbaijan. Eddie Howe mercifully rested the away side’s sleep paralysis demon Anthony Gordon, and while Camilo Durán’s smart finish for the visitors was met with polite Geordie applause, the match was killed off when Sven Botman headed home a corner near the start of the second half. With the win, the Magpies head to the last 16 of Europe’s greatest competition for the first time since 2003.

Bayer Leverkusen 🇩🇪 0-0 Olympiakos 🇬🇷 (Agg. 2-0)

This wasn’t a terrible game of football, but if it weren’t for the BayArena’s rampant soundtrack and colorful canvas, it could have easily been a friendly match. Kasper Hjulmand has overachieved with a Leverkusen team who were morally decimated by Erik ten Hag, while Olympiakos owner Evangelos Marinakis can now get back to sacking backing Vítor Pereira in Nottingham Forest’s relegation fight.

Tekela ‘Infinite Light.’ Built for the control-obsessed players who require pinpoint precision in their game.

Real Madrid 🇪🇸 vs. Benfica 🇵🇹 - Agg. 1-0 (TODAY, 3 p.m. ET, Paramount+)

Although this is about much more than football, on the pitch, everything is at stake – particularly for Real Madrid manager, Álvaro Arbeloa. Any Los Blancos loss is an over-scrutinized catastrophe, so Saturday’s 2-1 defeat to concede the La Liga top spot to Barcelona puts even more emphasis on sealing qualification against former mentor, José Mourinho. His suspension doesn’t mean he won't infiltrate the locker room via a laundry basket to help break Benfica’s woeful run of two wins in their last 14 UEFA away matches against Spanish sides, however.

PSG 🇫🇷 vs. Monaco 🇫🇷 - Agg. 3-2 (TODAY, 3 p.m. ET, Paramount+)

After Folarin Balogun’s brace put Monaco 2-0 up in this tie last week, PSG said anything you can do, we can Doué better. As a first-half sub for an injured Ousmane Dembélé, 20-year-old Désiré Doué single-handedly hoisted the UCL holders back into the match, and with the Ballon d’Or winner still out with a calf injury, the Creed to his Rocky must step up at the Parc des Princes. Monaco are 20 points behind the Parisians in Ligue 1 and only have one win in their last seven UCL away matches, but in Flo’s state, Balogun is a cheat code.

Juventus 🇮🇹 vs. Galatasaray 🇹🇷 - Agg. 2-5 (TODAY, 3 p.m. ET, Paramount+)

With three resounding consecutive losses and no wins in five, Luciano Spalletti’s honeymoon period at Juventus is well and truly over. History doesn’t favor the Old Lady as they try to recover from a chasmic 5-2 deficit in Turin today: they’ve lost their last five Champions League knockout phase ties, while Galatasaray have only lost three of their last 18 UEFA matches against Italian teams. Despite not scoring last week, Victor Osimhen is Galatasaray’s most lethal weapon, netting six in seven UCL matches this season.

Atalanta 🇮🇹 vs. Dortmund 🇩🇪 - Agg. 0-2 (TODAY, 12:45 p.m. ET, Paramount+)

Raffaele Palladino’s Atalanta are undefeated in 10 domestic matches and welcome Borussia Dortmund to Bergamo after a significant 2-1 victory over Serie A champions Napoli on Sunday. The Champions League, however, tells a different story of three straight losses, but the fact they’ve never lost four on the bounce in this competition is encouraging. Niko Kovač will have one eye on this weekend’s Der Klassiker against Bayern and knows that two goals is a precarious lead, especially if Atalanta’s New Balance Arena comes alive as it so often does on European evenings.

This week, we want to know who’s the missing attacking midfielder from Chelsea’s legendary 2012 final lineup where they defeated Bayern Munich to win their first Champions League trophy? Clue: he’s still playing football now!

Email us (or reply to this newsletter) with your answer for a chance to win a much-coveted MiB patch!

Our last winner: Congratulations to Miguel Kremenliev, who was the first to correctly answer that Oleksandr Zinchenko was Manchester City’s missing left-back from their 4-3 first-leg win against Real Madrid in the 2022 Champions League semi-final. Get in touch and we’ll send you a patch, Miguel!

🐦‍⬛ We’ll see you again tomorrow. In the meantime, keep sending your stories and questions to [email protected].

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